Returning to the Mother...

This is the first little tug on what feels like a long piece of thread…about living on the planet and our relationship to the feminine…its a big subject... and i apologize if the writing here is a little disjointed... i'm sharing ideas as they are forming... so here goes…

In my house I have a wall dedicated to Tonantzin… the mother… the savior of the Mexican people…while studying for my aromatherapy certification I wrote a paper about the essence Palo Santo and it came to me during the musing time before writing words that Palo Santo is the essence of the Mother… Palo Santo has all of the healing properties of frankincense but she is feminine not masculine. She comes from the Americas not the Middle East… she “told “ me that she is in fact the big healer for us who live in the Americas. She comes from the holy wood of Ecuador and Peru… and she is here for us … for healing… she is the Mother. She is one aspect of Tonantzin and She is inviting us home and the invitation is urgent…

Lately the question that has come to me over and over is why are so many women getting breast cancer?… why is it the women who are getting sick over and over? I kept saying to my husband… "we are the canaries in the mine… we are the canaries in the mine… " and then another piece trickled in…. we call our earth our mother… our earth is feminine. But look how the feminine is treated in most cultures of the world… how can we change how we treat our environment when we call our environment our mother if in fact we don’t really, not really, have regard for the mother? …How can the feminine aspect of the cosmos, the planet earth reside in our consciousness in a place of great reverence if that is not how we act towards the feminine off our species.?…

My husband recently returned from a trip to Nashville. He went to check on his cows and to see our friends the McCormick’s, to attend the Christmas party at the ranch, and to pick up the newest member of herondale farm, Reba, the great Pyrenees guarder of sheep. A huge white fluffy puppy! …I guess he listened to the radio a lot on the long drive home because he stood at the kitchen counter and explained to me what causes breast cancer according to a breast oncologist who herself has recovered from this disease… he said it is directly caused by the poisons in the environment… round up on the weeds…the pesticides on the corn. The hormones in the cow milk. The breast is the most sensitive organ in any human body… it is most sensitive from puberty until the woman’s first child… and during this time if it is filled with toxins these toxins help to form the aberrant cells… so we are poisoning the source of mother's milk... on every level ...

He actually thanked me, for being the crazy that I am, and sticking to my guns and driving around and around, insisting that my children eat organic food in the eighties in London. " I am so lucky to be married to you," he said… and in the quiet moment standing in our kitchen in semi darkness a profound healing went down. A shift occured from the teasing me and resisting my efforts to this simple acknowledgement of how I’ve tried to nurture our family and how possibly it could turn out to be exactly the right thing all along...

He and I got to talking about this concept of the feminine… how much regard he has for all of the aspects of this. From the Divine Mother to his gratitude to his own mother and then for me, his wife, and for his daughter… to the land he is steward of…. and it came to me how simple it is really… how quiet and gentle it can be …How if we change our thinking… our feelings about this how naturally without even thinking about it we will begin to change how we live on the earth… we wont’ have to march and protest and be angry etc… we will come from a place of genuine love and respect and naturally care and nurturing will follow.. And in the meantime I feel it is a good idea to pay close attention to the female humans of the species… our bodies are reflecting the body of the Mother… we are calling out …

These photos were taken a while ago when I first began taking pinhole photos… I had this feeling of Eden… a place of freedom and beauty…. It is the place our Mother provided… it is the place in my visions while studying with Palo Santo… this place is the place I feel also while reading The Ringing Cedar Series by Vladimir Megre.

The invitation has been issued… She is urging us to return before it’s too late… And it is up to us...


The photos are mine... the photo of the painting of Tonantzin is of the painting by Emily Grieves at the dreaming house in Teotihuacan, Mexico.

Journey to Q'ueros

There are a few places left on earth it seems that are truly original. Where no cars, or machines, or electricity, or gasoline have ever been. Where the language of the people is shaped by the land and sounds like the whisper of the wind or the gurgle of a brook over stones. Where there is little shouting, when a whistle will do.

Q’ueros, high in the Andes mountains in Peru is this place. After a day of riding on dusty buses and minivans from Cusco and then two days of walking/riding horses over two 17,000 feet, perilous, mountain passes you arrive in a place where the water still runs so clear and clean you can drink from the streams, the silence is profound and the sun falls down in clear cascades of light.

You sit in a valley as the sun is setting. Off in the distance two children are herding the llamas back to their corral. There is no sound. No sound at all. You are cocooned in a silence so still it seems this must be where possibility begins. One of the children begins to sing and dance alone on the hillside with her llamas. The Q'ueros song. And in one clear stroke of feeling you absolutely understand in your very cells that we are The Children of the Sun. That it isn’t just a story, a myth, that there is an Inner sun within us, an Outer sun that we see in the sky, and The Sun behind the Sun, the Creator of it all, but that this is fact. And that we always have been the Children of the Sun. Some of us have just forgotten. We have forgotten the song. But In Q’ueros you remember.

for dylana.

i had no idea you were gone. i had no idea of course that you would go so quickly. you were wonderful. young, vibrant, an incredible healer.

as i was leaving your office one day i saw that you had always been an acupuncturist. i saw you as a chinese man. right there in the flesh. i hesitated and then shyly told you as i hovered in the doorway ready to flee lest you thought i was completely crazy. you smiled and asked if the veil was always that thin for me. apparently today it is i replied. and you said, yes, all of us who have been chinese doctors before learn really quickly.

yes i said. i understand.

but really it seems that i understand nothing. it seems really that nobody knows anything, not priests or psychics or doctors or spiritual leaders. maybe we all get little glimpses of it. and some think they know but for me all of it is a tremendous perplexing, sometimes painful, alot of really wonderful, huge mystery. and the only thing we can do is live. and live right now. in peru i could actually see how heavy energy affects our bodies. almost instantaneously. so part of living for me is to work on that. really open my heart. really love. really identify and drop the heavy energy so there is more room for the refined. i was hoping to get to tell you that in person. instead i'm telling you here, perhaps, through the veil you will see.

today, i wish the veil was thinner so that i could see you once more and whisper good bye and say thank you for all that you did for jerry in his healing process and for me. i can't fathom why your time this go around was so short but i imagine that you know and it's all for some reason or another. and in the meantime i learn once again that i must treat each encounter with the understanding that life is really and truly only happening right now. there is no past. there is no future. dylana you were an absolute wizard . you still are a wizard. we will miss you so!

love

iva

finding my voice on this journey

usually i feel i have to write my own words here. but today is mary oliver's birthday and this poem about, the journey, finding your voice, your own unique life, is one of my favorite ever poems. some how my whole life seems bound in these words. today i am in peru and i have lost my voice. in the beginning of this journey i dreamt that to find the light really we would have to clean ourselves thoroughly, drop heavy energy, go through the obstacles, and so the obstacles are presenting themselves and all i feel is a huge SOARING joy.

losing my voice today must have some wondrous significance and so along we go with our amigos and teachers. Lorenzo and Don Martine . and every time we do a ceremony. receive a karpai, we are able to release more heavy energy and let more light in. yesterday we learned that from the Q'uero perspective this is the key . that if all humans work on themselves alone and in ceremony and in gatherings of any kind then when they gather in larger groups the light can really burst through and shine. this is our journey on earth.

if we save ourselves we save each other.

so here is Mary Oliver's poem.

i'd love for you to follow the blog of our filming journey with the Q'uero if it interests you. www.picaflorproductions.blogspot.com

ayanchaykil/sulpayki (thank you in quechua. from one dove's heart to another. is literal translation)

xxxxx

The Journey

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice--
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do--
determined to save
the only life you could save.

© Mary Oliver. Online Source

The eagle flies with the condor...

in peru i learned about this idea of the eagle flying with the condor. yesterday while digging around in my garden this came to me. the eagle flies with the condor. the north flies with the south. our minds fly with our hearts.

and the hummingbird darts through the entire fabric... spreading joy... whizzing with love.

so i am here... plodding along alot of the time... thinking thoughts like what am i doing here and what am i supposed to be doing and am i doing it this supposed thing? and then i walk into my garden and really am filled with awe.

from the beginning this idea of growing things has amazed me. it wasn't really on my list of things i thought i might ever do. (along with living on a farm) but i planted things and they grew! so my garden was a place filled with vegetables and i grew the three sisters. corn beans and squash. and i felt i should sing to them to help them grow... and then last year andy, a true and deep farmer came and planted the most spectacular vegetables all over the farm and herondale blended with his sol flower farm and my song changed... i planted native plants and medicinal herbs and mostly they are one and the same.. i mean medicine in the plants indgenious to this place... and they are exotic and wild looking many of them... much more exotic than plants europeans have imported..

in the meantime, i read about a miracle place in scotland called the findhorn community where they do more than sing.. they grow astonishing gardens by communicating with the nature spirits .

i thought well if singing makes things grow i wonder what would happen if i really determined to communicate with the nature spirits. and so i stepped into my garden and declared out loud that is what i would like to do. ok you know i figured even if this was crazy it was entertaining and then i let go of the eagle, my critical mind and all the judgements it likes to impose, and climbed onto the back of the condor with my trusty little humming bird by my side and off we soared into the unseen. i asked about everything i planted.. and when i got the feeling i was being answered i did what i was told. i planted with no logic. i chose plants i was guided to and planted them where i was told. and then this year i went into the garden as spring loosened the earth and lo and behold.. a tremendous pattern had emerged... colors all complimentary and lush... purples and reds in a plan more magnificent than my novice mind could have imagined and to top it off two huge hollyhocks planted themselves. they are the correct colors for the gardens design and even they are medicinal... it is just extraordinary... and it is true!

the eagle needs the condor and when they fly together the world becomes a magnificent place!

so last evening i began to photograph... and while i was taking the last images a young hummingbird, just growing it's colors , came to sip from the scarlet bee balm, so close to me i heard the buzzing of it's wings... it wasn't worried about me standing there in my white wings... or my little dog by my side... we just quietly went about our business, the humming bird, my camera, my dog and i...

so here are the photos taken from the condor's back in the land of the eagle.

the garden spirits showed themselves ....

so cool ...

dolphins and the hummingbird...

during acupuncture... i had a vision of a dolphin swimming from some ancient place... like lemuria and joining with the hummingbird of peru and these two became one creature they merged and the joy of the dolphin flew into the sky on hummingbird wings....

the apus, the mountain spirits in the andes, were whispering and whispering and i understood this language in my heart but not my head... it was something to do with simply dropping all the ideas that did not manifest joy...

it was simple...

i feel that this was transmitted to us all on the journey during our initiations...

change the perspective... drop all thoughts... no matter what, drop thoughts that do not bring great joy...

and once again

dance...

that's all...

my iphone is my new favorite camera...

one of the photos is of the night sky and the dolphins the other is the sun coming through the trees always there for us no matter what... even if we can't see.

xxx

peru

Peru keeps on dreaming through me.. I, and the others in my little group were initiated by the Q'uero elders and somehow this has taken us all and connected us molecularly to the moon, the sun, the incas, the stars, the wind, the water....
and so now the Apus, the mountain spirits, seem to be dreaming through me and although i am here in new york in the snow and rain and slush, i am also there, with Lorenzo and Martine and juliana and Lake titicaca and the sacred valley... there are secrets about living here on earth that they have kept close for a very long time and now it seems they are sharing these secrets with the world and once again life has expanded... there is so much more than I ever imagined, and you know, i imagine ALOT, and yet there is more, more than I can imagine and all I have to do it seems is stop my rational mind, open my heart, readjust my eyes and see....
over and over it came to me how simple it is really.. life loves us... all we have to do is breathe and love it back... really...
te amo!
xxx

YOU, FOR US ARE EVERYTHING

FAR AWAY SO CLOSE... WIM WENDERS.

what the angel says at the beginning of this extraordinary movie...

"YOU, who we love. you do not see us. you do not hear us. you imagine us in the far distance... that we are the messengers... who bring closeness ... who are distant... we are the messengers ...we bring the light into the darkness.... we are neither the light, nor the message... we are the messenger . we are nothing, nothing. You for us are everything...